23
Apr

Sperm Count

   Posted by: abelle   in daily dose of laughter

An 85-year-old went to his doctor’s office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, “Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.”

The next day, the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained:

“Well, doc, it’s like this - First I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. she tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still nothing.”

“We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit and she even tried squeezin’ it between her knees, but still nothing.”

The doctor was shocked! “You asked your neighbor?”

The old man replied, “Yep, And no matter what we tried, we still couldn’t get the jar open.”

22
Apr

Tuesday Toot#5 - 04.22.08

   Posted by: abelle   in tuesday toot

Here’s my toot for the week.

Yesterday, Jeff and I went to the ENT doctor for his check up. Good news: he’s not undergoing tonsillectomy for there is a chance that Jeff outgrows his tonsils (they are quite large for his age).

Another thing is I’m done with my assignments – I had the aircon installed, finished cleaning the house and bought some more clothes for my husband. Dario’s flight to Manila is tomorrow and we’re picking him up from the airport on Thursday afternoon. Now, our room looks fresh when he arrives.

Happy tooting! ;)

Celebrate World Earth Day this month (April22) by buying goods that are green. But with so many products claiming to be earth-friendly, organic and natural, how do we know if we’re really saving the earth?

Don’t be Duped
Terms like natural and eco-friendly are on everything these days. “But that means absolutely nothing,” says Diane MacEachern of theworldwomenwant.com. These terms haven’t been defined by the government, yet manufacturers use them without backing them up. Only a certified third-party endorsement on the label guarantees green. For instance, Green Seal verifies many household products. And those three arrows in a circle? They mean only that an item can be recycled, not that it’s made from reused materials.

What to Look Out For
Not all labels tell the truth. Dr. Jaca Cubrillo, spokesperson for Lavera Naturkosmetik, warns that a product with just one per cent of natural ingredients can be labeled ‘natural’. For products to be considered 100% organic or natural, it should have certification from an internationally recognized certification body like BDIH Foundation in Germany or ACO (Australian Certified Organics). Cosmetioc products, in particular, are notorious for containing ingredients that are synthetic and toxic even, so consumers looking to buy truly natural skin care products should be mindful of labeling claims.

Cotton doesn’t always mean it’s natural. “Just because cotton comes from a plant, doesn’t always make it a ‘natural’ product,” says Issy Richardson, founder of Belle and Dean, a line of organic clothing for women and children. Organic cotton clothing is made from organically grown cotton that’s free from pesticides and harmful chemicals and grown using natural farming methods that are safe for our environment. Again, look for certification like SKAL (Netherlands), Ecocert (Europe), USDA and Soil Association (UK).

source: Reader’s Digest Apr2008 issue, pg138

20
Apr

How to Tell if You Have Smelly Feet

   Posted by: abelle   in visuals

18
Apr

Six days to go . . . . .

   Posted by: abelle   in the life of an ordinary earthling

And my husband is coming home!

18
Apr

Patungkol sa iyong mga katanungan sa buhay

   Posted by: abelle   in pinoy miscellaneous


Datapwat hindi ako nakakasiguro sa lahat ng aking mga sagot,
susubukan kong bigyang liwanag ang ilan sa iyong mga katanungan…

Ang isa kong kaibigan ay mayroon lang mga ilang katanungan na matagal ng bumabagabag sa kanyang araw-araw na pamumuhay. Maaaring ang iba rito ay alam na rin ninyo ngunit walang tumpak
na makapagbigay ng akmang kasagutan o pagpapaliwanag. Ito ay ang mga sumusunod:

1. Ang squidballs ba ay bayag ng pusit?

Ang squidballs ay hindi bayag ng pusit
baka bayag ni Tiya Pusit.

2. Pwede bang uminom ng softdrink kapag coffee break?

Pwedeng uminom ng softdrink kung coffebreak ngunit kailangan itong lagyan ng asukal at kopimeyt. Kopimeyt dapat at huwag gatas (milk in my cereal, kopimeyt in my pepsi. sounds good to me!)


3. Pwede bang gamitin ang a.m. radio pag gabi na?

Maari lamang gamitin ang a.m. radio kapag gabi kung ang iyong pakikinggan ay o.p.m.


4. Ang fire exit ba ay labasan ng apoy?

Ang fire exit ay ginagamit lamang bilang labasan ng apoy kapag may sunog. Ito ang kanilang daan upang sila’y makatakas o ang tinatawag na “fire escape”.


5. Ang uod ba pag namatay ay inuuod din?

Ang tao kapag namatay ay hindi tinatao. Malamang ang uod ay hindi rin inuuod. Kung ang tao ay inuuod kapag nalagutan ng hininga, siguro ang uod kapag namatay ay tinatao.


6. Totoo bang ang mga manok na pinatay sa Jollibee ay masasaya kaya sila tinawag na chicken joy?

Ang mga manok na pinatay sa Jollibee ay masaya kung kaya’t sila’y tinawag na chicken joy. Ngunit hindi kinakailangang sa jollibee patayin ang manok upang ito ay maging masaya… ang
mga manok ay nagiging masaya kapag sila ay may kasama sa buhay. Kapag ito ay nag-iisa lamang, ito ay hindi chicken joy kundi …mcchicken singles. (Ang pinakamasayang manok sa lahat ay iyong 6 pcs. chicken mcnuggets o tinatawag na “ o-r-g-y” sa inggles)

7. Mayroon bang kahit isang langgam na mahilig sa maalat?

Alam na ba ninyo iyong patawa na “itlog maalat”? Nakagat ako minsan ng langgam……. kung nakagat ka na ng langgam sa itlog, ibig sabihin marami ring langgam mahilig sa maalat.


8. Kung ang 7-11 store ay bukas 24 hrs a day , 7 days a week, at 365 days a year. Bakit may lock pa ang pinto nila? Bakit? Bakit?

Dalawa ang dahilan. Una, may coffee break (tingnan ang katanungan bilang 2 hinggil sa maaaring inumin kapag coffe break) din naman ang mga nagtatrabaho sa 7-11. Pangalawa, mayroon tayong tinatawag na leap year.


9. Bakit di mataas ang highway?

Dahil kung mataas ang highway, walang paglalagyan ng skyway.

10. Ba’t alang lumilipad na sasakyan sa flyover?
Hindi lang natin nakikita ang mga nagliliparang sasakyan sapagkat hindi tayo tumutingala kapag tayo ay nasa flyover. Ang pagsalin ng dayuhang salita na flyover sa katutubong wika ay “fly”-lipad, “over”-sa ibabaw. Ibig sabihin nito na ang mga kotse ay hindi lumilipad sa flyover ngunit sa ibabaw ng flyover. Ngayon kung titingala ka naman kapag
ikaw ay nasa flyover ang tangi mong makikita ay ang kisame ng iyong sasakyan. Alam kong wala sa inyong mayroong sasakyan na Miata, Boxster, Kompressor, Z3, Z8 at kung ano-ano pang kotseng pang-
mayaman kaya’t huwag na kayong magpumilit mamilosopo… ako lang ang may karapatan. Kung idadahilan niyo naman na mayroon kayong sunroof, hanapin ninyo ang inyong tinatawag na “sense of humor”. Namamatay ng maaga ang palaging seryoso.

Sana ay nasagot ang ilan sa inyong mga katanungan sa buhay. Kung mayroon pang ibang bagay na bumabagabag sa iyong isipan huwag kayong mag-atubiling ilapit sa mga kina-uukulan o kaya sarilinin nyo
na lamang para di kayo pagtawanan.

At lagi rin sana nating tandaan ang dayuhang salawikain na “ask a dumb question and you’ll get a dumb answer.”


Maraming salamat at walang anuman ;)

17
Apr

One Sun for Everyone

   Posted by: abelle   in bloghopping here and there

A blog that talks about anything under the sun, the moon, the stars – everything! That’s what my blog is about. This is because I talk just about anything here on earth as well as what’s outside it. And I know I am not the only blogger in this world who does.

Everything Under the Sun is a blog of a person whom I share many things in common. Like me, Beth is also a Filipina (but lives in the US), married to a husband who works out of the country (her husband is with the navy), likes looking at the sea or river and in her thirties. Well, there may be more than that! One thing I noticed though is that she goes to the gym and I’m not and that what makes us different. I hate exercise and the gym is the last place on earth I’d be seen. ;)

17
Apr

Men’s Pick-up Line Destruction

   Posted by: abelle   in daily dose of laughter

Man: “Haven’t we met before?”
Woman: “Yes, I’m the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic.”

Man: “Haven’t I seen you someplace before?”
Woman: “Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”

Man: “Is this seat empty?”
Woman: “Yes, and mine will be too if you sit down.”

Man: “So, wanna go back to my place?”
Woman: “Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?”

Man: “Your place or mine?”
Woman: “Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.”

Man: “I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
Woman: “It’s in the phone book.”
Man: “But I don’t know your name.”
Woman: “That’s in the phone book too.”

Man: “So what do you do for a living?”
Woman: “I’m a female impersonator.”

Man: “What sign were you born under?”
Woman: “No Parking.”

Man: “Hey, baby, what’s your sign?”
Woman: “Do not enter.”

Man: “How do you like your eggs in the morning?”
Woman: “Unfertilized!”

Man: “Hey, come on, we’re both here at this bar for the same reason.”
Woman: “Yeah! Let’s pick up some chicks!”

Man: “I know how to please a woman.”
Woman: “Then please leave me alone.”

Man: “I want to give myself to you.”
Woman: “Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.”

Man: “I can tell that you want me.”
Woman: “Ohhhh. You’re so right. I want you to leave.”

Man: “If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.”
Woman: “Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.”

Man: “Hey cutie, how ’bout you and I hitting the hot spots?”
Woman: “Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.”

Man: “I’d go through anything for you.”
Woman: “Good! Let’s start with your bank account.”

Man: “I would go to the end of the world for you.”
Woman: “Yes, but would you stay there?

Have a happy Thursday, people! I’m going out today, not to be picked up, but to run errands. ;)

16
Apr

Tagged once more

   Posted by: abelle   in tags

Here’s a tag from Gen from her new blog (thanks!)

Rules:

1. Post this rules.
2. Answer the questions honestly.
3. Tag your friends and tell them by commenting their blog, you have a tag for them.

Questions:

1. How old is your blog/blogs?
2. When is your blogs birthday?
3. For one sentence, why you blog?
4. What kind of blog do you have?
5. Did you make your own blog layout?
6. What did you learn here in blogging world?

Here are my answers:

1. This blog is 2-1/2 months old (I have two older ones, more than a year old)

2. Feb02, 2008, a week before my 31st birthday

3. I blog because I love writing. It is my passion.

4. A personal blog that talks about anything under the sun, the moon, the stars - everything!

5. I am currently using a wordpress theme, then I just play around with the pages and the sidebar.

6. I learned more things about different people and their cultures, that I can share some of my ideas here with others and learn from them as well.

Now I’m passing this on to Rocks, Ambet and to others who are interested!

15
Apr

Tuesday Toot#4 - 04.15.08

   Posted by: abelle   in tuesday toot

I had a very, very tiring day today, guys, I can barely write. I went shopping for some items we need:

1. a new bed sheet with matching pillow cases

2. 2 shirts for my husband (he’s coming home next week)

3. a pair of shorts for my husband again

4. new undies for me ;)

5. some grocery items for the week

6. vitamins

7. circuit breaker my husband asked me to buy

Bye for now, people! Talk to you again tomorrow.

Page 18 of 25« First...«1617181920»...Last »
ss_blog_claim=99fabd22593fce7097a3f5c71ace681a