28
May

Spielberg and a Pinoy

   Posted by: abelle   in daily dose of laughter, pinoy miscellaneous

A Pinoy went to a bar in Hawaii to have some drinks. At the counter, he sat next to the famous Hollywood director, Steven Spielberg who was already ahead by a quart of alcohol. After a couple of beers, the Pinoy sensed that Spielberg was glaring at him. Suddenly, in a flash, the Pinoy crashed down from his stool, felled by a vicious hook from the director.

Picking himself up, he yelled, “Wat da hell is dat por?”

Spielberg ranted: “That’s for the bombing of Pearl Harbor, you #@@!!##! My dad perished in that bombing!”

“#@@!!##! I am not Jafanese, you stufid Nincomfoof! I am Pilifino!” exclaimed the Pinoy.

The inebriated director replied, “Yeah yeah yeah…Japanese, Burmese, Chinese, Vietnamese, Filipino …you’re all the same!”

Regaining his composure, the Pinoy dusted off his white pants, straightened the collar of his loud bird-of-paradise printed shirt, took his seat and ordered a double R&B from the bartender. After a few sips, the Pinoy stood up and delivered his best Jackie Chan karate kick, sending the director flying halfway across the room. “What was that for?!!” shouted the surprised Spielberg from about fifteen feet away.

“Dat’s por da sinking of da TITANIC! I had my grandpader on dat shif!” the Pinoy answered back.

“You ignorant Chink! The TITANIC was sunk by an iceberg!” exclaimed the director.

“Yah yah yah…Iceberg, Sfielberg, Carlsberg… you are all the same . . …. also!”

26
May

Mother and Child Bond

   Posted by: abelle   in the life of an ordinary earthling

I am sure many of us have received, been given or made a ‘friendship bond’ for our own circle of friends. It is a way to tell the world that you’re best friends with your pals. But nothing beats the bond of a mother and her child. The photo above shows the ‘bond’ between me and my son who is now 10 years old and currently in 5th grade. I still keep these pink and blue bracelets of ours that have our names on it. Our names there may fade and Jeff’s bracelet no longer fits him, but we will remain mother and son forever.

This post is also an entry to a contest hosted by Carlota of Dashing Smiles. Thanks, Carlota! ;)

26
May

Daddy’s Corner Tag

   Posted by: abelle   in tags

Just a little something to honor the wonderful men of our planet . . . . .

{Start Copy Here}

Started by Mitchteryosa
Rules:

1) Copy from {Start Copy Here} to {End Copy Here}.
2) Blog Brag about your husband - yes, the father of your child/ren. As I’ve said singles may also join by bragging about their own fathers, or even grandfathers. It doesn’t matter! Of course, Daddy bloggers themselves may also join, but you have to blog about your fathers and not about yourselves, deal? Okay. Good.
3) Add your blog in the master list below linking to the post that you just made. Or if you wish, do it as how I’ve done it in my other blog by adding a new page.
4) Leave your comment here and don’t forget to leave your link so you can be added on the masterlist. Yup. Here. Thanks!
5) Let’s not forget Peppermint Creative for the corner border I used for the badge.
Masterlist
  1. When Silence Speaks
  2. Everything About Deye
  3. Etc Atbp
  4. Pinay Mommy Online
  5. Coffee Cup Princess
  6. Pinaymama’s Dairy
  7. A Mother of Yesterday, Today & Tomorrow,
  8. Everything that has Breathe Praise the Lord,
  9. Kate Ashley,
  10. Top Form Secrets
  11. Marilyn
  12. Anything and Everything in Between
  13. Can of Thoughts
  14. Only in Silence
  15. You’re Next….

{End Copy Here}

I’m sending this over to Adelle, Gen, Rhodilee, and everybody!

26
May

The 50th Birthday

   Posted by: abelle   in daily dose of laughter

A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels pretty good about the results.

On her way home she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving she says to the clerk, “I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”

“About 32,” is the reply.

“Nope! I’m exactly 50,” the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald’s and asks the counter girl the very same question. The girl replies, “I guess about 29.”

The woman replies, “Nope I’m 50.” Now she’s feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, “Oh, I’d say 30.”

Again she proudly responds, “I am 50, but thank you.”

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question. He replies, “Lady, I’m 78 and my eye sight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are.”

They wait in silence on the empty street until curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, “What the hell, go ahead.”

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast. He gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, “Okay, okay…How old am I?”

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says. “Madam, you are 50.”

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, “That was incredible! How could you tell?’

The old man replies, “promise you won’t get mad?” “I promise I won’t.” she says.

He replies, “I was behind you in line at McDonald’s.”

25
May

Tada!!!!!

   Posted by: abelle   in the life of an ordinary earthling

Hello there, people! I’m back, at last. My husband, our son and I spent three weeks in Bataan and just got home last night. And though I missed my PC and this blog so much, I was too tired to write anything. Anyway, I’m here now to keep everyone updated, informed and laughing again. Just as I always do! No boring stuff. No nonsense. Just all things interesting. I promise ;)

25
May

I make it to the fence in 2.8 seconds . . . . .

   Posted by: abelle   in visuals

can you? ;)

18
May

How Do I HIT Thee? Let Me Count the Ways . . . . .

   Posted by: abelle   in visuals

Flushing old medications might seem like the best way to keep them out of your child’s reach, but it creates a potential public health hazard by allowing drugs into our water supply.

Similarly, do not pour it down the sink as it may end up in the local water table. And do not throw it in the trash. It may still be within reach of kids and pets.

The safest way to get rid of leftover medications is to take them back to the pharmacy. However, not all pharmacies are required to take back unused medications but you can inquire at your local drugstore or pharmacy for options. Besides prescribed medicines, vitamins and minerals are chemicals, and can also be harmful to the soil and groundwater.

source: Reader’s Digest May2008 issue, pg136

11
May

Friends

   Posted by: abelle   in visuals

A funny but touching cartoon for this week . . . . .

I’m a colon ;)


You Are a Colon


You are very orderly and fact driven.

You aren’t concerned much with theories or dreams… only what’s true or untrue.

You are brilliant and incredibly learned. Anything you know is well researched.

You like to make lists and sort through things step by step. You aren’t subject to whim or emotions.

Your friends see you as a constant source of knowledge and advice.

(But they are a little sick of you being right all of the time!)

You excel in: Leadership positions

You get along best with: The Semi-Colon

Take more quizzes here.

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